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12-Feb-2020 18:15

“If we’re defensive, all that does is ratchet up the intensity,” he said.• Not every conversation has to involve hot-button issues. Fairbank suggests talking about holiday traditions from your family’s past.

But children can also learn a lot from watching you have a challenging or tough conversation with someone, Wilder said.For example, responding in a less defensive manner to the query of why you’re unmarried may help the questioner better understand how your generation approaches marriage.• Be prepared.You’ve probably attended enough holiday gatherings and functions to know what family, colleagues and friends want to talk about at the dinner table.“The purpose of conflict is understanding, rather than winning,” Brittle said.• Ask open-ended questions.Make an effort to get to the heart of that person’s view, Fairbank said.

But children can also learn a lot from watching you have a challenging or tough conversation with someone, Wilder said.

For example, responding in a less defensive manner to the query of why you’re unmarried may help the questioner better understand how your generation approaches marriage.• Be prepared.

You’ve probably attended enough holiday gatherings and functions to know what family, colleagues and friends want to talk about at the dinner table.

“The purpose of conflict is understanding, rather than winning,” Brittle said.• Ask open-ended questions.

Make an effort to get to the heart of that person’s view, Fairbank said.

But for many, there’s a downside: Tense conversations over a myriad of hot-button issues; arguments over politics; friends and family who insist on asking about personal matters such as dating, career choices and raising children (or not raising them).